I just want to start by saying that these are two of the most infuriating statements that I have ever heard in my entire life. Not because they are infuriating to me, per se, but I know how infuriating they can be to someone that is in an emotionally stimulated state.
Most of the time when someone is upset to the level of “calm down” or they are at the stress level of “get over it”, it is because THEY are having difficulty processing some pretty significant information to THEM. This is a serious issue for THEM. However, frequently when we tell someone to “calm down” or “get over it”, it is because WE are uncomfortable with their emotional state. WE are having difficulty navigating our own emotions related to THEIR response. It has nothing to do with THEIR crisis or confusion or frustration.
Rather than telling someone to calm down, how about finding a way that honors their difficulty. A phrase that I frequently use is, “I need you to take a breath. I am having difficulty understanding what is going on.” This allows you to take accountability for your own difficulty without projecting it onto them. It also allows them the opportunity to pause to find appropriate language to express what their needs are.
You may be asking yourself, “Who is this woman, and why should I listen to her?” Well, truth be told, I don’t know. However, what I do know is that life can be hard and societal norms can be suffocating. So, maybe that will be helpful to you.
At the time of this writing, I am pushing the half-century mark in my life, and I am pushing toward the quarter-century in my marriage. I am a wife, a mother, a grandmother, a daughter, a social worker, a life coach, a reiki master, an animal lover, a spiritual person, but more than anything else, I am a human being. I have had the honor of walking this world for almost 50 years. And I couldn’t be more grateful.
I know, it sounds cheesy, but it is the truth. I am not going to give you my life story because to me, it is boring. However, I have known a lot of upset in my life. From being in an abusive relationship, to being in an adoring one. From losing a child, to watching one reach his 30th birthday. From being homeless, to holding a master’s degree. From drug use, to being a caring soul for those who feel that all is lost. I have run the gambit of what it means to be human. I have hitchhiked across the country, and I have also spent time getting my roots.
So, if you are interested (or just morbidly curious) to see what comes from this head of mine, stay tuned.
Much Love & Goddess Bless
Life is Beautiful Therapeutic Services, LLC (LIB-TS) is a alternative therapy practice that focuses on ensuring that the treatment that you get is right for you. It is my intention to ensure that each individual is treated with the dignity and respect that every person deserves regardless of race, socioeconomic status, religion/faith, or sexual orientation/identification.
LIB-TS is a holistic therapeutic practice that specializes in the joining of energy alignment, mental health, and spiritual understanding. It is a goal of LIB-TS to incorporate treatment of the body, mind, and spirit to ensure that those that need help to get the help they want.
Along with having certifications in several mental health and therapeutic service programs, I strive to help build the whole person through supporting nutritional, physical, and spiritual well-being and activities. I pride myself on serving people in the holistic sense and not just the symptoms.
I am a very laidback woman. I am a Licensed Certified Social Worker, and I have been in practice in the fields of mental health and substance abuse for over 15 years. I love what I do and I have a passion for helping to end the stigma associated with mental health.